It’s not just a song by the Beatles. You remember them. That was the group Paul McCartney was in before Wings. Paul McCartney? Sigh. He’s that old geezer who sang with Kanye West.
Oh, where was I? Ah yes, Yesterday. It was my birthday. I thank all the people over on Facebook who wished me well — it was appreciated on a crazy day concluded with a Temple Board Meeting and Calendaring meeting. In honor of the day and the new number, a little song (slightly modified):
So when you find it in your mailbox for the first time my friend
You can tell that you getting older, you’re turning grey
It’s a first sign of decline, it’s a start of the end
When your wrinkles out number your hairs
then it’s headed your way
Modern Maturity AARP Mag’zine, means you’re getting old
When you get the magazine
that you hide from your friends
Once it was Rolling Stone, it was thrill after thrill
Now Modern Maturity AARP Mag’zine means over the hill
When Mick Jagger has his breakfast of yogurt and bran
Does he read of prescriptions by mail or of self-rising chairs
You can keep on rockin’ and rollin’ as long as you can
But then you sit in your little seat and you ride up the stairs
Modern Maturity AARP Mag’zine, means you’re getting old
When you get the magazine
that you hide from your friends
Once it was Rolling Stone, it was thrill after thrill
Now Modern Maturity AARP Mag’zine means over the hill
I’ve looked through its pages and what I see there
Is that everyone looks about twenty-five with white hair
You can buy polyester pants for nineteen ninety-five
You can get your grandchildren’s picture on your coffee cup
And if you’re tired of walking
there’s a scooter that you can drive
Or a button to push if you’ve fallen
and you can’t get up
Modern Maturity AARP Mag’zine, means you’re getting old
When you get the magazine
that you hide from your friends
Once it was Rolling Stone, it was thrill after thrill
Now Modern Maturity AARP Mag’zine means over the hill
MODERN MATURITY (Tom Paxton)
Copyright (c) 1993 Pax Music (ASCAP)
I mention this song because of an article I saw today: “Bob Dylan appears on the cover of AARP magazine“. Yup. Mick Jagger and Bob Dylan can go into Denny’s and get that senior discount, and their concerts (just like the recent episode of Mom) are filled with walker parking areas. Why is Dylan in AARP Magazine? Because he’s announcing an album of Frank Sinatra covers (which targets an even older group of AARP readers, although I’m finding I appreciate Sinatra more and more).
Now, excuse me while I chase some children off my artificial lawn. And that music they listen today, it’s … oh, nevermind.
