A Birthday Song for aliza250

OK, Folks, you know the drill. Let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform, wearing a Viking hat (horns and all), strides out, introduces himself as Sheriff John, and says:

I know you’re wondering what happened to my sharp lawman’s cowboy hat. We’ll, in honor of today’s song, I’ve decided to wear a different hat. I’ve also asked the Volga Boatmen to accompany me on this song. This is going out to you, aliza250.

He then clears his throat, takes out his guitar, plucks an “A” note, and then starts singing:

Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Now you’ve aged another year Now you know that Death is near Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Now that you’re the age you are Your demise cannot be far Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Birthdays come but once a year Marking time as Death draws near Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Long ago your hair turned grey Now it’s falling out, they say Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) May the cities in your wake Burn like candles on your cake, Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!)

Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Burn the castle and storm the keep Kill the women, but save the sheep Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) May your deeds with sheep and yaks Equal those with sword and axe Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Now you’ve lived another year Age to you is like stale beer Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Were I sitting in your shoes I’d go out and sing the blues Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!) When you’ve reached this age you know That the mind is first to go Happy Birthday! (thud!) Happy Birthday! (thud!)

[Did you know you can pick which song the Sheriff sings for you on your birthday? It’s easy. Just visit the 6th Annual Birthday Poll on Livejournal (FB users: you can now log into LJ with your FB ID and vote in the poll!). Note that if you want the birdie to be able to inform the Sheriff about your birthday, you need to make sure your birth month and day is in your LJ or FB profile, and it is visible to your friends. Note that the Sheriff only sings a song if I know you personally or you’re a regular commenter. So don’t lurk!]