[This rant is a result of a request in response to my rant meme by kerinda. She asked for a rant on “People who use the word “retard” as a noun.” Do you want a rant? Then reply to the rant meme… and follow the instructions and post it to your own journal. It is a wonderful creative writing exercise. ]
[He walks out, with a soapbox. He sets it on the ground. He climbs up on it, and speaks…]
Now folks, today’s lesson is about the English language. You know that language… you hopefully speak it everyday. Please go to your shelf, and pull down your dictionary. The word for today is “retard”.
The primary use of this word, folks, is a verb. It means to slow the growth of something, combining “re-” (again) with “tardare” (slow). Thus, you might retard the growth of a plant by keeping it out of the sunlight. This is an old old usage, dating back to the 15th century. The verb has been nouned (if that is a word) to refer to holding back or slowing down (the usage dates to 1788), but again… it refers to slowing down. Retard also has a use in the world of music, referring to a decrease in rapidity or tempo.
So, those of you using the word “retard” in any other way, shape or form: it’s offensive, and you only show your lack of intelligence by using the term. It’s like calling Mr. Obama by his full name, or referring to Mr. McCain as John Sydney McCain. It is just impolite, and not done in (ahem) proper company. Get out that mental floss, and just wipe that noun from your vocabulary.
I’ll say it again, more bluntly, because perhaps you’re too slow to get it: Retard is not a synonym for stupid. Nor is diptard. Nor is fucktard. Using the word in this sense only shows that the speaker is uneducated, and doesn’t have the creative energy to actually choose the correct word. Precision is important in language. Folks like that are just… are just….
Dipshits.
So there. Pffffffffft.
[He carefully climbs off the soapbox. He picks it up, and walks offstage.]
