Recently, Newsweek had an interesting article on one of the new quandries of social networking: just who do you let in your social networking. That article was driven by an AP story I read, which noted “Increasingly, however, [Scott Siegal, age 18] and other young people are feeling uncomfortable about their elders encroaching on what many young adults and teens consider their technological turf.” The article also noted that “Nowhere are the technological turf wars more apparent than on social networking sites, such as MySpace and Facebook, which went from being student-oriented to allowing adults outside the college ranks to join.” I do strongly recommend folks to read the article.
I was reminded of this today when one of my daughter’s friends, greenscar, friended me. Should I friend her back? After all, it would be sorta creepy (I think) at that age to have “a parent”-type reading your stuff; I certainly wouldn’t want to do that to her. I would also need to think about what I write, and would it be friendly for her (luckily, that’s actually not a problem for me, but I know would be a problem for many others).
But it raises an interesting, larger question: Is there just one social network? There might be things or thoughts I would express with “friends” that might be inappropriate for “cow orkers” (although I have some friends that are both). There may be things more appropriate for generational or generational±1 peers that would be inappropriate to express to LJ-friends who are my daughter’s age. There’s the other direction, which I don’t have to face: would I want friends of my parent’s generation reading what I write. Do we really need multiple types of friends lists, or is what we have here sufficient?
I’m lucky in some ways. I don’t write intimate sexual details (although I do have the occasional off-color remark). I don’t write salacious details about work, and I do try to friends-lock (with appropriately filters) anything that might be sensitive until it is no longer so. But I’m sure others have more of a problem, especially those who grew up with these networks as part of their lives from day 1, and are used to having their entire life online.
So, what’s your position on this issue. If you were one of the teens on LJ, would you be creeped out by a parenting friending you? If you are of parental age, would you think twice before friending a teen? Would you feel weird if your mother or grandmother friended you, even as an adult? What about a cow orker?
[And yes, this is a long-winded way of thanking greenscar for valuing what I write, and explaining why I may not be friending her back. It’s nothing personal.]
