Tired of the Rain/Anti-Garden Song

OK. I’m tired of this rain. It looks like once things calm down, I’m going to have to go out and clean the gutters once again. I’m containually checking the ceiling to see if the leak has started up (it only starts up when enough water comes in at a particular angle, which tells me it is most likely in the area underneath the plenum return on the roof). To make things worse, supposedly this storm will be around until early next week. East coast folks: You can stop laughing now. Yes, folks in Southern California get annoyed when the sun goes away.

Last night we had a delightful Shabbat evening with the Schwartz family. While over there, I picked up a song parody I just have to share. Many folks may be familiar with “The Garden Song“, written by Dave Mallet. It was recorded by many folks, including Noel Paul Stookey and Peter, Paul, and Mary. It’s the one that goes:

Inch by inch, row by row
Gonna make this garden grow
All it takes is a rake and a hoe and a piece of fertile ground
Inch by inch, row by row
Someone bless these seeds I sow
Someone warm them from below till the rains comes tumbling down

Well, it turns out there is also an “Anti-Garden Song” (link has music), with lyrics by Eric Kilburn:

Chorus
Slug by slug, weed by weed,
My garden’s got me really teed
All the insects love to feed upon my tomato plants
Sunburned face, scratched-up knees
My kitchen’s choked with zucchinis
I’m shopping at the A & P next time I get a chance.

The crabgrass grows, the ragweed thrives,
The broccoli has long since died.
The only things left still alive are some radishes and beans.
My carrot plants are dead and gone,
Hear the rabbits sing a happy song
Until you’ve weeded all day long you don’t know what boredom means

Chorus

You get up early, work till late
Watch moles and mice get overweight
They eat their dinners on a plate from the hard work you have done
As ye sow so shall ye reap,
But I smell like a compost heap
I’m gonna get that lousy creep who said gardening was fun

Chorus

Today is mostly a home day, except were going down to Long Beach this evening with  ellipticcurve to see Once On This Island. Tomorrow is Dim Sum and Gaming!

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