{"id":8563,"date":"2013-09-28T11:12:58","date_gmt":"2013-09-28T18:12:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/?page_id=8563"},"modified":"2013-09-28T11:12:58","modified_gmt":"2013-09-28T18:12:58","slug":"lyrics-birthday-bitch","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/?page_id=8563","title":{"rendered":"Lyrics: Birthday Bitch!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-5246\" title=\"userpic=sheriffjohn\" alt=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/01\/userpicsheriffjohn.jpg\" width=\"100\" height=\"77\" align=\"right\" hspace=\"10\" vspace=\"10\" \/>OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let&#8217;s gather in front of our large, 13&#8243;, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out accompanied with a bevy of beautiful birthday girls, introduces himself as <a href=\"http:\/\/www.tvparty.com\/lostlasheriff.html\" target=\"_blank\">Sheriff John<\/a>, pulls out his accordion, and says &#8220;This song is for you, [assignment: <em>name<\/em>]:&#8221;. They all sing:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\u2230<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Happy birthday Ivy, you\u2019re pretty as a girl can be<br \/>\nThe boys have gonorrhea, now they burn for you each time they pee<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Happy birthday Ivy, you are the special birthday bitch<br \/>\nWe go you some vagisil to help clear up that nasty itch<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">What the hell, the bed\u2019s still warm cause Ivy never sleeps alone.<br \/>\nSame old gift from different givers, throw the dog another bone!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">Happy birthday Ivy, you&#8217;re the ugliest of all<br \/>\nYou are the worst and most perverse to roam Cecilia&#8217;s hallowed halls<br \/>\nYour mother was a hooker and your father was a dick<br \/>\nHe poked her in a toaster and the pair produced a pig<br \/>\nWhose brain is awfully tiny and whose ass is awfully big<br \/>\nHappy birthday bitch, happy birthday bitch\u00a0!<br \/>\nHappy birthday Ivy, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch\u00a0!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let&#8217;s gather in front of our large, 13&#8243;, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out accompanied with a bevy of beautiful birthday girls, introduces himself as Sheriff John, pulls out his accordion, and says &#8220;This song <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/?page_id=8563\">Read More &#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"parent":5245,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-8563","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8563","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8563"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8563\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8565,"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/8563\/revisions\/8565"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/5245"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cahighways.org\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8563"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}