From The Oddbeat News Department: BLITEOW, Kosher Search Engine, Publicity Stunts

Some interesting items, from today’s lunchtime reading of the news:

  • From the “BLITEOW” Department: For those that didn’t figure it out already, Saturday was “Blog Like It’s The End Of The World”. This is a day when blogs write as if the world was coming to the end, often due to a zombie attack. Well, according to an opinion piece in the LA Times, there are some zombies attacking. Zombie politicians, to be more specific. Newt Gingrich, to be even more specific. His foreys into politics just won’t stay dead. Dick Cheney is rapidly becoming a zombie as well.
  • From the “Don’t Try To Search for Cats and Cheezeburgerz” Department: According to Yahoo! Tech, there is a new search engine for the very Orthodox Jews: Koogle. The site, at, omits religiously objectionable material, such as most photographs of women which Orthodox rabbis view as immodest. It appears to meet the standards of Orthodox rabbis. Its links to Israeli news and shopping sites also filter out items most ultra-Orthodox Israelis are forbidden by rabbis to have in their homes, such a television sets. Nothing can be posted on the Jewish Sabbath, and supposedly if you try to buy something on the Sabbath, it gets stuck and won’t let you.
  • From the “Shameless Publicity Stunts” Department: At the Edinburgh Fringe show in the UK, there is a new competition: the Malcolm Hardee Award for Best Publicity Stunt. The front-runner is comedian Lewis Schaffer, who earlier this month sent out a press release claiming that the Edinburgh Comedy Awards were going to be renamed in his honour after he’d agreed to sponsor them for £99. Of course, one might argue that the award itself is a publicity stunt…

Putting It Together…

There are reports that thousands of residents in the Hollywood Hills have lost their power. The newspaper reports are blaming squirrels, but I just don’t believe it. Wild rodents can’t live in Los Angeles — too much concrete, plus they can’t come up with the rent payments. Further, there are power failures all over the country: Dallas TX, Newark NJ, Flint MI. It can’t be a coincidence.

Just like this swine flu. For something that is supposedly so mild, they are being really quick to call it a pandemic. Somebody isn’t telling us the full story.


Cere-BRUM! Cere-BRUM!

As I have said before, the news seems to be becoming a parody of itself. It appears PETA is up in arms about Seattle’s Pike Place Market. Today, I’ve heard they are upset about merchants there tossing brains around. As the economy has gone down and fish have become scarcer, the merchants moved from fish to brains… and business has grown thanks to the zombies at Microsoft. I’ve heard how customers can point to an attractive large lobe, and another merchant will scoop it up from the ice, hoist it over his shoulder and send it flying 15 feet toward the counter. “Cere-BRUM! Cere-BRUM! Heyyyyyy!” six men scream in unison. “Goin’ right home! Goin’ right home!” The counterman catches the hurtling lobe neatly between the fore and mid brain and slaps it onto a wrapping sheet.

But PETA is just up in arms. Asserting that the practice of lobbing brains above the heads of patrons and tourists at the market and other venues is disrespectful to creatures that already have gone through a lot, the group is protesting plans to stage a flying-brain exhibition. They argue that tourists would not be nearly so eager to snap photos if dead kittens or gutted lambs were sailing over their heads.

“Killing … so you can toss bodies around for amusement is just twisted,” said Ashley Byrne, senior campaigner for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals in Washington, D.C.



Shirley, You Jest!

I’m about to go start cleaning the house, for today we’re going to be invaded by a bunch of shambling bodies in search of brains. No, I’m not referring to zombies. Whatever gave you that idea? My daughter’s holding a swim party today for members of the High School theatre tech crew. Of course, if zombies did attack here, I’m not sure we would know the difference. Do they eat hot dogs?


Whew! What a trip!

I knew there was an attack occurring today, but it mucked up the freeway more than I expected. The San Diego Freeway was wall-to-wall zombies from below Century Blvd all the way to the valley. Luckily, our vanpool is large enough that most of us made it home tonight. One didn’t: she was on the van in the morning, but there was no sign of her this evening. She works for a different company; I think their physical security was unable to corral the brain dead.

Tonight we’re mostly huddling at home. I saw mostly, because nsshere is going to a friend’s birthday party. However, I think she’ll be safe: she’ll be surrounded by teenagers (who are already safely brain-dead, but zombie-immune). I don’t think any zombie worth his or her salt would go near 13 and 14 year olds. They’ll target the nearby malls instead.



A Narrow Escape

Well, I just successfully escaped from the Air Force Base. It was remarkably quiet over there today, with lots of people missing. Those that were there had this glazed look in their eyes, and were searching for brains… but I’m told that’s normal for government workers. Luckily where I am now is quiet, and is safely fenced. But the offices are strangely empty, not like yesterday. I wonder if somethings amiss…